How Your Shadow Side Holds You Back (and What You Can Do About It)

What stops you manifesting?

The answer is your shadow. Those beliefs, thoughts, feelings and energies which you are not consciously aware of, but which exist in your mind at some deep level. 

For example: “I don’t deserve it.” “I’m not worthy.” “I’m not clever enough to make money.” “No-one will ever love me.” “Life is a struggle.” “This isn’t for the likes of us.” And so on. 

These are the beliefs which each and every one of us holds unconsciously. They are the beliefs which we form in childhood due to what we learn about ourselves as we grow up. (Some people think they can be transmitted culturally, or even genetically. The latter is part of the science of epigenetics.)

And because these beliefs are held in the unconscious, we are not even aware of them. But they control every aspect of our lives, and direct us outside of our awareness to achieve or manifest certain outcomes – or not, depending on whether those beliefs are positive or negative.

But while some people succeed in manifesting money, and success of this kind appear to follow them wherever they go, others are driven by a poverty consciousness. And for these people, accessing these “core beliefs” held in shadow and changing them are essential before they stand any chance of manifesting success and achievement.

These shadow beliefs are what we conventionally think of as the result of childhood emotional woundings, which in turn are the product of the inhibition or repression of different archetypal energies. It’s important to understand the role of shadow held in the unconscious in blocking manifestation. 

Beyond this, it is a simple fact that lack of achievement for dysfunctionality in any area of life is probably the product of a shadow belief system. Suppose, for example, that  you carry a belief that you cannot get what you want. (This is, by the way, very common in society today.) We would regard this as a Warrior wound. In other words, for some reason your Warrior archetypal energy is blocked. ( Read about this here.)

Or you might simply believe you are not good enough to receive financial abundance. This could be a King or Sovereign archetypal wound. (Read about this here.)

Video – The King Archetype

In all such cases, the solution is to do some shadow work. Get the help of a facilitator trained in shadow work and find a way to take the energy out of your unconscious and make it conscious. 

Then you open up whatever you’ve hidden away, out of sight if not out of mind. And then you can transform it into something more useful and helpful that serves you better in your life today.

It’s an approach that takes the parts of yourself you stuffed away as a child out of your shadow and brings them back into the light. And it honours them, heals or transforms them if necessary, makes them into a positive and helpful part of you, and finally integrates them into the essence of who you are today.

There are many names for this approach: “Healing The Shadow”, “Emotional Process Work”, and “Shadow Work”, for example. But whatever you call it, this is all about getting your sabotaging, holding-back, limiting and now generally unhelpful parts out of shadow. And it’s also about giving you control over them so you can access their energy in a helpful form. In short, these techniques can make your shadow energy available to you in a healthy, emotionally mature way to use in your life today. And if that sounds exciting, so it should!

You’ll discover how to step into your power. You’ll become more emotionally mature, stronger, more independent, more balanced, and better able to give and receive love.

You’ll be better able to set healthy boundaries and you’ll become a stronger and more powerful leader in your life. You’ll develop the strength and will to get things done more effectively, think more clearly, and stop making harsh judgments about yourself and others.

You’ll develop a much easier relationship with love so you can give and receive genuine love freely. In fact just about every other problem that you have in your interactions with other human beings will become more and more manageable and simply melt away over time.

Perhaps you think that sounds too good to be true. But just for a moment imagine how your life might look right now if you’d enjoyed an ideal childhood in which your needs were fully met. A childhood throughout which you were loved and supported unconditionally and where you were allowed to express your personality exactly as you wished. A childhood in which you could grow to embrace all your qualities and values and learn how to manage all the emotional energies within your personality.

Imagine what your life would now be like if you’d had the opportunity to fully access every part of your psyche rather than having to use your energy in repressing parts of yourself that were unwanted or unsafe to express for some reason in your childhood. Do you think that might have made a difference to your life? Yes?

You are absolutely right; your life would most likely have been very different. Now you can bring those changes to life anyway. Through Emotional Process Work, Healing the Shadow, Shadow Work – call it what you may – you can fully grow into your true self, overcome the blocks of emotional development which have held you back until now, and heal your emotional wounds. And you can do this no matter what stage of life you have reached. (Best of all, and most powerfully, of course, is to actually study the art of shadow work facilitation yourself and qualify as a practitioner.)

What’s even better is that this approach is equally effective for all of us, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, ethnic origin or any other characteristic which appears to separate us. For when we say that in our workshops and one-to-one consultations, “All of you is welcome here”, we really mean it. And we mean it because our work focuses on the one thing we all have in common – our humanity.